Divorce is one of the most difficult tests for a couple. And although the relationship is over, many want to maintain friendly ties with their ex-partner.
This is especially important if the couple has children. But how can you make sure that friendship after divorce is sincere and comfortable for both parties?
First, it is important to give each other time and space to recover from the breakup. Don't try to establish a close friendship right after a divorce. It is better to wait a few months or even a year for emotions to subside. During this time, everyone will be able to adapt to the new life.
Secondly, you need to learn to communicate with each other in a new way. You are no longer spouses, but just friends. So avoid ambiguous conversations and hints at past closeness. Focus on the present.
Third, be respectful. Don't criticize your ex-spouse's new partners or lifestyle. Remember that each of you is starting a new life.
If you follow these tips, friendship between ex-spouses is quite possible over time. The main thing is to go to it gradually, giving each other the opportunity to change.
Once enough time has passed since the divorce, you can begin to restore friendly relations. But how exactly do you do this?
First, start communicating about children. Discuss their successes, problems, plans for the future. Children are the only thing you have left in common, and caring for them can bring you closer.
Secondly, if possible, spend time with the whole family, especially on holidays and birthdays. This will show the children that mom and dad are still friends. This is important to them.
Thirdly, support your ex-spouse in difficult times. For example, if one of your parents is seriously ill, come to their aid, offer your support. In trouble, people often see the most important thing.
Fourth, don't hold grudges against each other about the divorce. Let the past stay in the past. You are no longer spouses, but friends, so focus on positive communication.
Gradually, such sincere and respectful communication will help move from divorce to true friendship. The main thing is to be patient and not force things. Friendship between former spouses takes time.
Once the foundations of friendship have been laid, you can move on to closer communication.
First, try to spend time together without children. Go to the cinema, cafes, concerts. One-on-one communication will help you get to know each other better.
Secondly, share news from your life. Talk about a new job, a hobby, friends. But do it with respect - do not criticize each other's choices.
Thirdly, if new partners have appeared, try to introduce them to each other. Avoid jealousy. After all, you are just friends now.
Fourth, try to support each other's new relationship as much as possible. Don't compare your new partner with your old one. Be glad that your ex-spouse is happy.
Fifth, be open and sincere. Share your innermost thoughts, give each other advice. The main thing is that friendship is based on mutual trust and understanding.
Following these tips, over time, the friendship between ex-spouses will become strong and sincere. You will stop associating each other with past grievances and will be able to appreciate the positive things that were and are in your relationship.
Previously, we talked about how to understand that you are being manipulated by a manipulator .
Author: Valeria Kisternaya
